


Never Again

by sumcp



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angry Stiles, Beta Derek Hale, Derek Hale is Bad at Feelings, First Kiss, M/M, Oblivious Derek, Past Jennifer Blake/Derek Hale, Past Kate Argent/Derek Hale, Stalia never happened, brokenhearted derek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-28
Updated: 2018-07-28
Packaged: 2019-06-17 12:10:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15461079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sumcp/pseuds/sumcp
Summary: Derek feels like it’s time to leave. After almost dying in Mexico, Kate running away to lick her wounds, Braeden leaving, and Stiles.. It’s just time for him to go.





	Never Again

Derek was tired. Emotionally, physically, and every other sense of the word. He wanted nothing more than to lay down in his bed that still smelled faintly of Braeden and the sliver of happiness he had. It wasn’t like they were soulmates. It wasn’t like it was a big deal. It’s just that she saved him, and helped him, and maybe he got attached to the idea of being happy for a change.

 

It wasn’t who he wanted to settle down with although he could do worse. Hell, he’s done worse. Way worse. 

 

Kate.

Jennifer.

 

Currently Derek sat at 1-2 for psychotic girlfriends. It was equal parts sad and pathetic. Although, at least he wasn’t batting 100. Braden wasn’t hell bent on destroying everything and everyone to get what they want or a murderous bitch. No, Braedon was just not in it for the long game, and that was something Derek knew. He  _ knew.  _

 

But.

 

She was beautiful, kind, brave, and she challenged him. She saved him. She taught him how to be human. She taught him to push. She was totally his type, except for the fact that she didn’t have eyes like liquid gold or moles that shattered her skin-- Nope, not going there, not  _ at all _ , and he will deny going there with his last breath-- basically, Braeden was great. 

 

Did his stomach do ridiculous flips when she was near him? No. Did he have trouble focusing when she was talking? Of course not. Did she try to get a rise out of him and annoy him in every possible way and constantly put herself in danger? No, well, okay maybe she did but that’s beside the point. 

 

She wasn’t going to settle. She didn’t want the white picket fence, she didn’t want kids, she didn’t want everything he did. And god, did he  _ want.  _ He was sick of running, he was sick of hiding from his past and thinking about everything he lost, he wanted to focus on what he could have. He finally came to terms with the fire. With the death of his family. With Laura. With every bad thing that had ever happened in his life. He stopped letting the guilt of what Kate did eat away at his soul, because it wasn’t his fault. He still held a lot of guilt, Erica, Isaac, and Boyd being at the top of that list, but he won’t ever get the chance to make that right.

 

He was no longer an alpha, even though that was a huge relief he didn’t know if he could be a good beta for Scott, especially since they have such different views. Hell, maybe Scott wouldn’t even want him. He had his own pack, and Beacon Hills would be way better off with him as alpha. 

 

So he was packing it up. He told Cora to expect him in a week or two once he had everything settled, he was fixing to go drop the lease to the building off with the Sheriff, knowing he could use the extra income if he wanted to rent the lofts out. Derek meant to get around to it, but with every supernatural koo-koo that was hell bent on destroying them, he just couldn’t find the time.

 

The nagging voice in his that said this sounded more like running, than moving on, sounded so much like his big sister hurt as much as it annoyed him. He wasn’t running. He was done running. Done with a capital D.

 

He wanted to settle. He wanted to be in a place that didn’t still have the smell of smoke in the air, or have the painful reminder of everything he did loose or a place he didn’t have to look over his shoulder every damn minute in fear of something coming for him. 

 

That was all. It was simple. Too many bad memories combined with a supernatural vortex equals packing a bag. He wasn’t running. He just had no reason to stay. He had no pack, he didn’t have family here, he didn’t have anyone that would miss him.

 

He winced at Laura’s cackling laugh in skull, and he tried his damndest to ignore it as he picked up the duffle bag from the floor and then the property papers from the coffee table. He didn’t want to make the drive to the sheriff’s office, but he knew he had too.

 

He wasn’t prepared to meet the older Stilinski because no matter how many times the man arrested him, he still reminded him of his own father. Derek knew where Stiles got his fierceness from, it was all Noah’s. He felt his pulse increase at the thought of Stiles, and damnit, he really thought he had this under control, but know he couldn’t stop picturing the last time he saw Stiles. 

 

Derek was bleeding out, Braeden trying to stop it and he just knew he was done for. He didn’t see a bright light, or his life flash before his eyes, all he saw was Stiles. The boy was staring at him, unable to move, looking like he was fixing to cry and Derek hated it. All he wanted to do was go to him and tell him. 

 

Tell him that he was the first person he trusted since the fire. That he was so grateful for him saving his life that night in the pool. That he is too good for this town and for this life. Derek just wanted to tell him he was thankful for getting the chance to know what trust is again, what love is again.

 

Derek stared at the papers, noticing the big number with multiple zeros at the end valuing the property and felt his stomach sink. He’d tell the Sheriff to use it to pay for Stiles to go wherever he wanted for college. He deserved it. He deserved to get out of Beacon Hills, have a nice normal life, go to parties, and not worry about werewolves and kanimas and aztec temples in mexico. Derek wanted that for him. 

 

Derek wanted everything for him.

 

Just as he started walking toward the door he heard the familiar squeal of tires and brakes and he closed his eyes as he narrowed in on that familiar heartbeat he could pick out in a crowd. It was beating too fast, erratic as if he was scared or nervous, and it made his heart ache.

 

He mentally snapped out of it, waiting for him to come barging in like he always does, but he didn’t. He paused outside the door and Derek got a whiff of pain and anger and it made his wolf whine with worry but he pushed the feeling down.

 

Derek decided to wait on him, wishing he would have escaped with no goodbyes because saying goodbye to Stiles seems impossible, but he had too. He wanted to move on. He wanted to be happy. He wanted Stiles to be happy too, even if it wasn’t with him, so he was going to say goodbye.

 

Derek laid the duffle on the coffee table and just finished throwing the papers down when the door to the loft slid open and the pounding of the young boys heart got closer.

 

“What are you doing here Stiles?” He tried to keep the bitterness out of his voice, it wasn’t Stiles’s fault. He didn’t like Derek like that. 

“You’re leaving…” He turned around to see Stiles staring at him with his bambi eyes on full display but after a moment he watched them harden. They were no longer open, instead closed off to were Derek couldn’t make heads or tails of what he was feeling. 

 

Stiles’s emotions were all over the place, each one hitting Derek with full force. Heartache, pain, worry, bitterness, but the most prominent one was anger. So much anger.

  
  


“It’s.. It’s time. Stiles--”

 

“Were you even going to say goodbye? To Scott? To Me? After everything we’ve been through.. You were just going to leave us?” Stiles was too calm as he spoke, especially since he was giving Derek whiplash from his emotions.

 

“Stiles..” 

 

What was it the boy always said? Ignore the problem until it does away? Well this was him, ignoring the problem.

 

“What are you doing here?” He asked again, wishing all this was over. All he wanted was a clean break, why couldn’t Stiles just give him that.

 

“Yano what.. I came here to talk to you. No fuck that, I came to yell at you!” Derek jumped in surprise at Stiles sudden scream and when he turned around he noticed Stiles was practically fuming.

 

“What-- Why--”

 

“Why?! Because of what happened at the Church, that’s WHY!” The boy screamed back as he crossed the room to get to Derek. 

 

He watched Stiles, chest heaving in anger and his heart racing and all Derek wanted to do was pull him into his chest and hug him.

 

“You want to yell at me for getting stabbed?” He asked, raising an eyebrow in confusion and in the blink of an eye, all the anger left. 

 

Derek watched Stiles’s eyes thaw as the coldness left replaced with the most heartbreaking golden orbs and his wolf practically demanded him to fix it. To apologize and do whatever he can to make Stiles okay again.

 

“No.” Derek watched as Stiles looked up at him, noticing tears forming at the edge of his eyes. “You made me leave Derek..” Derek stood there, unable to move, and watched as Stiles closed his eyes and wiped the tears that managed to fall. “You were dying Derek.. And you made me leave you.”

 

Derek opened and closed his mouth for what seemed like forever before speaking again. “Stiles, Scott needed help.. It was the right thing to do.”

 

“No Martyrwolf, you don’t get to do that!” Stiles surprised Derek by surging forward and pushing him, making him stumble slightly at the surprise attack before Stiles started yelling again. “You don’t get to decide if someone else’s life is worth more than yours!” 

 

Derek caught Stiles’s wrists before the boy could push him again and Stiles fought again the hold, trying to get to him, to hurt him but Derek refused to let go. Finally Stiles stopped fighting and before he could let go, Stiles collapsed into his chest.

 

Derek didn’t know what to do as he felt Stiles’s tears soaking his shirt so he just pulled the boy close. He didn’t know how long they stayed like that, clinging to each other, but he refused to pull away first.

 

“You sent me away..” Stiles sniffled in his shirt and Derek just ran his cheek down the side of Stiles’s head as he talked. “You were _ dying _ Derek.. And you send me away and all I could think about was if--if that was the last time I’d ever see you--” Derek felt the rise of panic in him and immediately pulled him away and grabbed Stiles’s face so he was forced to look at him.

 

“Hey hey hey..” Derek ran his thumbs along Stiles’s cheek, collecting the tears that fell as he tried to soothe away his worry. “It’s okay…  _ I’m _ okay.” 

 

“No it’s not Derek.” Stiles held onto Derek as if he would disappear into thin air. “Because you keep doing it. You don’t realize--” He stopped suddenly, taking a deep breath. “I’ve lost enough people Derek.” 

 

That one sentence was like a gut punch. Flashes of his own family, of Stiles and his mother, of Erica, Boyd, Allison, even Aiden, coulded his vision to a point he felt tears in his own eyes.

 

“Don’t do that to mean again Derek.. Please.” He knew he shouldn’t make that promise. 

 

That promise was someone who was staying. Who had someone to stay for, and Derek didn’t. He couldn’t move on in a town Stiles lived in. He couldn’t be happy if he had to see Stiles everyday, but that didn’t stop him, because at this point, Stiles could of asked Derek to chop off his arm as some sort of apology and he would. 

 

“I won’t.” Derek vowed, cupping Stiles’s face, bushing away more wetness with his thumbs. “ _ I won’t.” _

 

“Good.” Stiles blinked, his eyes drifting down to Derek’s lips and back again. It was brief and Derek honestly thought he imagined it, but before he had a chance to comment Stiles was speaking again. “Where you really going to leave without saying goodbye?”

 

Derek felt embarrassed under Stiles’s judgmental stare as he dropped his hands from the boys face.

 

“I was going to text you guys..” He trailed off as Stiles started to chuckle.

 

“Oh sourwolf..” His tone was nothing but fond as he stepped closer to Derek and wrapped his arms around his neck catching him off guard. “Are you still wanting to leave?” He asked, biting his lower lip slightly.

 

For the first time, Derek let himself think he might not be reading too much into this. They always shared silent looks, comforting touches when need be, and saved each other on a daily bases, but Derek always knew Stiles didn’t want this. Didn’t want him. And now, with Stiles this close, his breath fanning on Derek’s face, his scent spiking with nerves and hopefulness, he let himself image it.

 

“Do you want me too? Stiles.. I-- I’m not dumb enough to know to think I’m good for you. I have issues and not the best track record when it comes to dating or this town..” Derek took a deep breathe, deciding to go for it, to get what  _ he _ wanted for once. “But I am so in love with you and if there is the slightest possible chance that you feel the same way.. I will stay.” 

 

Derek felt his heart pounding in his ears as Stiles just stared at him, awestruck. Derek didn’t have a chance to second guess himself, to apologize, to pick up his bag and run out of the loft with his tail between his legs and heartache on the brain because Stiles just grabbed his face and held it so Derek had no choice but look into his eyes.

 

“Stay.” That was all Derek need before he surged forward and covered Stiles’s lips with his own. The kiss was everything Derek ever wanted and nothing like he imagined, which made it perfect. 

 

Sure, there was issues to work out. Derek still hated Beacon Hills. He still hated everything it stood for and everything he lost, but Stiles was here. And Stiles wanted him. So he was staying. Besides, moving on is overrated anyway.

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Hey yall, I post for TW on my tumblr @huntersanonymous, check it out :)


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